The Law of attraction and the HAVE-DO-BE dynamic

The Law of attraction and the HAVE-DO-BE dynamic

Many people in the law of attraction community talk about what you have to do in order to gain money and abundance. This seems to be the main focus and a life goal for many people. Today I’m going to talk about an alternative way to go about if you want to attract wealth into your life without that possessive mindset. There’s a much easier way to go about if you want to attract abundance into your life.

It is possible to want abundance but not want fame and status and the toxicity that comes with that mindset. If you are an INFJ or INFP person, it is even highly likely that you see abundance in a different way that mainstream culture does.

Keep in mind that this is my interpretation of the law of attraction. Take with you what resonates and leave the rest.

The Spiral Dynamics model and the law of attraction

In order to get you to fully grasp this dynamic I want to introduce you to a developmental psychology model called Spiral Dynamics. I want to give credit to the founders of the Spiral Dynamics model, Don Beck and Christopher Cowan. I can clearly see the correlations between the HAVE, DO and Be mindsets and some of the different stages in this model. If you’re not familiar with the model, you can check out the Spiral Dynamics model here. It is by far the most interesting model I’ve come across and it has helped me in both understanding myself and other people.

So what does this model have to do with the law of attraction, you might ask. Well, it turns out, quite a bit. When I’ve studied this model I also saw the correlations between the different mindsets and value systems that people have in different stages of the model, and how those mindsets approach the law of attraction.

The HAVE mindset

When you first start to discover the law of attraction, this is the first stage that you enter. Many people discover it while they’re in this stage of development. Why? My belief is that as you get a deeper understanding of the law of attraction, this understanding in and of itself can help you to escalate up the spiral model and develop your mindset.

When you’re in the HAVE stage, you are still in a kind of needy and clingy mindset. You expect everybody else to fulfill your wishes and you’re not so interested in making the effort towards fulfilling your life for yourself. You often blame others for why you’re in the position in life that you are.

Unfortunately, if you find yourself in the HAVE state, you are oftentimes still in a lack mentality and when you discover the law of attraction in this stage of development you’re mind is mostly occupied with how you can learn to get by. You’re trying to make ends meet and you can’t get why your life sucks and never seem to get better. Everything is everybody else’s fault.

When you discover the law of attraction in this stage, it becomes an escape plan for you that you really, really want to believe is true. But you can’t really believe it, since nothing in your outer reality is showing you any proof yet. You use the law of attraction to try to get away from your problems instead of creating new realities for yourself. (This comes in the BE stage. More about that later!)

The DO mindset

When you enter this stage, something happens. It goes well with the achiever mindset and it is also the orange stage of Spiral Dynamics. When you’re at this stage in your development of the Law of Attraction understanding, it’s all about achieving and you develop a deeper understanding of the efforts you have to put in yourself in order for you to succeed. The orange achiever state is oriented towards success, and law of attraction practitioners at this stage often chase money, fame and material possessions.

The problem with this stage is that you haven’t yet developed a full understanding of how the world works in order to harvest all the goods from the law of attraction. A person in this stage still believes in an external, material reality.

If you’re still in this stage, I will encourage you to try some exercises to get to the next stage; the BE stage. One way to get into a more playful state is to imagine that you create your own reality 100%. Play with the idea that your life is a movie and you’re the director. Take 100% responsibility for your actions and reactions.

Let’s say you want to become an illustrator. You want to make a living creating beautiful art. Start every day with a meditation and thank yourself for allowing yourself to be an illustrator. Find situations that you might like as an illustrator. See yourself creating beautiful illustrations for people and adding beauty in the world.

The BE mindset

This is when you get to the higher stages of the model. You start to relax a bit and your mind makes a leap towards a new paradigm that has to do with a more energetic interpretation of the world.

You might start to make a morning routine where you include a This has to do with your beliefs in how the reality is structured.

In the BE mindset you ditch the affirmations and vision boards. You’re more interested in being the person that you want to be by being it now. If “act as if” was the motto while you were in the achiever paradigm, you’re now leaning towards “be as if” instead. You start to BE the person that you want to be.

The outcome becomes less important than in the previous stages. You trust that you are in charge of your universe and that everything you wish fore is already the case. You just have to have the same resonance as that version of you. Frequency and resonance becomes more important, and you start to gain interest in the frequency that you are emitting rather than try to achieve a specific goal or outcome.

Detach from the outcome

The mistake you might make while you’re in the HAVE and DO stage is that you vividly imagine a specific outcome that you HAVE to have in order for you to trust that the law of attraction is working. Try to let go of a specific outcome and trust that your higher self will lead you where you need to be exactly when you need to be there.

The Law of Attraction formula

There are 7 steps to the formula.

  1. VISION. Envision your desired outcome as vividly as you can. Mix in all your senses when you do this. Try the “mundane day in my perfect life”- exercise, where you write down exactly what happens during a mundane day when you have reached your outcome.
  2. DESIRE. Mix in some emotions. You have to want this as much as you want to breathe air.
  3. BELIEF. You have to KNOW that you are the one emitting the frequency that is holding the thing you desire. Think of yourself as a radio transmitting a radio signal. You have to “tune in” to the right frequency in order to hear the music you want.
  4. ACCEPTANCE. Accept and trust the process.
  5. INTENTION. Conscious commandment. Know that you are in charge of it.
  6. ACTION. Already BE in that reality that you want.
  7. DETATCH. Let it go utterly. This can seem counter productive with what I’ve just mentioned, but it’s not. You have to trust that the universe (that is you) is going to provide you with what you need in order to get you to your desired vision.
Trust and surrender to the process.

The letting go of the outcome is crucial if you want to succeed with the law of attraction. It works like this: You always get exactly that which you are a vibration of. If you vibrate in a frequency that is in the same range as the thing that you want, you might get it. But it might be something else that is within that same frequency, even though it’s not exactly what you think you wanted.

Follow the syncronicities

As you start to completely trust the process, you’re going to believe it more and more. And that is going to let you see more and more “proof” that your order is being handled by the universe. Note the small synchronicities in every day life. You won’t miss them if you’re being alert and mindful. Keep a journal or integrate your synchronicities in your existing journal. It can be fun to go back and see the small breadcrumbs that your higher self put in your way and what you acted on. You can learn a lot from that.

The law of attraction and INFJ + INFP

If you are an INFJ you have some advantage. You already have a deep connection with your rich imagination and inner life. To imagine new worlds is no problem for you. The problem that you might have is that you might not trust yourself yet. Try to sit with a meditation and as vividly as you can imagine yourself doing the thing you love the most.